God answered some prayers today! Trenton had an AMAZING day. His body is allowing him to tolerate noise, people, and new environments during this good phase that he is in. As one of his therapist told me today, " When he is in this phase he is just oblivious to what is going around him and his body is oblivious to all the stimuli." In return, it makes him able to tune all the stimuli out and he goes with the flow. I love it when he is in this phase.
This morning before we left I had already shed several tears and the feeling in my stomach was about to make me sick. Right before we left when I was putting on his shoes, " I embraced him and told him to remember that God is always with him even at times when Mommy can't be. Trenton and I said a little prayer together and we were out the door.
When we arrived, I walked him to his classroom and he ran immediately to all the fun new toys. In return, I just left immediately and sneaked out without saying good bye. I wanted to hug him and kiss him but I knew if I would, it would make the transition harder on him. Therefore, I just left.
I was so anxious to pick him up at 10:30. I drove by the school around 10:00 and saw him outside on the play ground. He was holding the speech teachers hand and looking at all the other children playing. It broke my heart. I drove by several more times to see him standing by himself. I was very thrilled that he wasn't wandering away but saddened that he wasn't playing with the other children.
His speech teacher walked him to the front door to meet me at 10:30. I, of course, would have done ANYTHING for him to run to me and acknowledge my existence. However, that is not the case with Trenton. He did not even respond to my voice (that is how much he is tuning everything out right now). When I finally grabbed his attention, he just looked past me with that blank, emotionless look. I just wanted to cry right there. Sometimes that is the hardest to handle. His inability to show love is very hard to handle when I just want him to really show me the typical love a toddler shows his mom. Anyway, the speech teacher said he did excellent! He didn't engage with anyone but he stayed right by everybody. He even sat in his seat at breakfast time and had some Fruit Loops! Its amazing what a day with low sensory problems can turn out like!!!!!!!!!!!! Trenton's sensory problems make or break his day. It makes or breaks his life.
I had a good feeling about today when he tolerated all the noise and children in Sunday School class really well yesterday. It is just simply amazing when he has low sensory problems how different his days can be.
Trenton and I drove immediately to therapy in Olney. He did not participate very well in ST. His therapist believed he was trying to relax and get the stimuli out of his body from school. I would probably agree. On our car ride over, he did fuss a lot and flap his hands continuously. His OT said that was his way of releasing.
He participated a little better in OT.
We arrived home around 1:00 and had a two hour break and welcomed Alicia in our home at 3:00. He did FANTASTIC for ABA therapy with Alicia. She could not have been more thrilled. I couldn't have been either. I love it when I do not listen to a meltdown the whole time during ABA. When she would ask him to hand her the blue pig out of a bucket full of animals.....he did!! Just like that!!! Again....amazing how he can even THINK when his threshold is low with his sensory disorder. Absolutely AMAZING!
Guess what............he hasn't slept well in three days either. Clonodine is not working anymore....at least not the last three nights. We are back to square one....waking up by 11:00 or 11:30 and back to sleep around 3:30 or 4:00. And up for the day around 5:30. UGH!!!!!!!!!!!! Back to sleep deprivation. Something that NO ONE understands, not even Tim. What I put up with in the night during those hours are simply unimaginable to most parents....even to Trenton's dad. I wish I had a video camera in our house so Tim and everyone else can see what it is really like in the night with a child with autism......
I hear a lot of opinions that if Trenton's sleep could get figured out then maybe he would be better behaved. I have always said this isn't true. The past three days are a good example. Trenton has averaged very little sleep and has had the best three days he has had in months. Trenton's key is help for sensory problems!
GOOD JOB TODAY TRENTON!!! YOU WERE SO BRAVE AND STRONG! MOMMY IS SO PROUD OF YOU! I LOVE YOU!!!!
ALWAYS AND FOREVER.
Pictures of his first day of Early Childhood.