Sunday, July 13, 2014


Some people have light at the end of the tunnel for their sorrows and tragedy in life. I am starting to think there is no light for Trenton and I. His sleeping and autistic behaviors are about as bad as it can get. I try not to blog about every night but sometimes there are nights that really need to be posted so the world can be educated. Unfortunately, due to no physical disability...autism families are judged.
 Last night was one of those nights that need to be posted. My total hours of sleep was two. TWO! It doesn't matter if I get 10 hours...autism is mentally and physically draining but when your total is only two...nothing can describe what my body feels like now  and what it will feel like at the end of this day. But that's not the focus of this post. The focus is what I saw my own child do last night. WOW! I wish I had it videotaped and there would be many jaws dropping at what autism is really like.

I have never done drugs. Therefore I have no idea what a drug addict goes through when their body is craving it. I have heard stories. That is about the closest that I can get to describing what Trenton's body was like all night last night. He was shaking.....he was running...he was pacing....he was verballing stimming non-stop...he was hitting himself in the head....he was tossing toys and stuffed animals all over the was as if he had no control over his body until his body got what it wanted. However, in Trenton's case, there was no drug to give him to calm him down. It was simply autism. His body was out of control and he couldn't feel his body which leads to his crazy, out of control acts. The adrenaline that was running through his body was out of this world. He was trying to catch his breath all night....he simply couldn't breathe right because of his adrenaline and non-stop moving. He was vomiting liquids all over house. His body was going 500 mph and his body could not handle it so he was vomiting non-stop because he couldn't just stop and relax. So what does your body do then....vomits!

I thought for sure by 1:30 AM he would be asleep by 4:00. No....its 8:00 AM and he is still wired beyond belief. Thank goodness Andrew spent the night with Nana and Pops because there was no way he could have slept through it. I have no idea how Tim did. Trenton was running full force into the walls and into every bedroom door.I wish I would have never seen what I did last night. I am just thankful Andrew was in good hands at Nana's house.

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