Thursday, April 28, 2016

A Work in Progress

I am reading this book right now.
I have read numerous books about autism and how to help your child, etc. I have also read countless family stories about their life with autism. Each and every book that I have read has helped me in many ways.
This book, however, is the BEST educational  book on autism. The authors did a tremendous job in writing everything in layman's terms.  My degree is in special education which has help me tremendously with my own children. I believe I have had people doubt me...thinking that I was just exaggerating or overacting on the depth of help the boys need, especially Trenton.
I am certain I have had people judge me when I have said that it takes only one time to not follow through on a procedure with Trenton for it to totally mess him up and never "get" what I am working with him on. 
The importance of CONSISTENCY is beyond critical with kids on the spectrum!! Just one time....only once for someone else to do something different and the child  will not follow through on the procedure. I haven't always been consistent myself. It is hard living 24/7 with autism. However, this book was the boost that I needed to refresh my mind!

The reason why I love this book is it is everything that I have said since Trenton got diagnosed. EVERYTHING! So....I suggest this read to anyone that has ever questioned why I do what I do!!!
 I am only on page 57 and have lots more to read but that is just how truthful this book is! LOVE IT!

Since it is just me raising the boys now, I have changed a few things and it seems to really be working with the boys. I am only away from them a few hours a week when they are with their father. It is amazing the difference I have seen in the consistency every day. Hence, this is why parents need to be involved in therapies, etc. It all carries over to the home environment.

Now, I will soon begin a few new task. Trenton's potty training got all messed up in December. TOTALLY MESSED UP! I am still in the process of getting it all together with them and will be starting the new process at home soon!

The importance of consistency is really hitting hard lately. Trenton will be 6 this summer and his early intervention years are almost gone. The type of autism that he has requires 24/7 care. Many families have 24/7 hired care for their child with severe autism. Sadly, they can't have any down time because that is when errors creep in and you lose progress.
I am not wealthy enough to have the around the clock help with Trenton. It's sad that someone's life is at stake because of money but sadly that is what most autism families deal with. However, I give him all that I can and do my best to stay consistent with everything, especially now since it is just me at home.

The key to helping children like Trenton and Andrew is changing their behavior. The more we go on without changing their behavior, the harder it is to change a person's behavior. That is with everyone but is especially hard for kids on the spectrum which is why the early years before the age of six are so crucial.
I am starting to panic in many areas with Trenton. He is getting older and we have to get a handle on many things with him before it is too late.

I watched a really good Lifetime movie the other day about a family with a daughter with autism. This family didn't get their daughter help till she was four and the mother blamed herself because her daughter was low functioning, she reminded me of Trenton. I don't ever want to live with blaming myself....I know I won't because I am doing everything that I can. Would it be easier to sit on the couch and not stress myself out fighting him with potty training and fighting him with not climbing on top of the fridge and counter tops....and fighting him with not constantly turning on water from the sinks, etc.....oh heck yes. My life would be so much easier to just sit back and let him destroy the house with his out of control behavior. .......but how is that helping him. Sadly, parents can't relax and enjoy the fun things in life while raising kids on the spectrum, especially the lower functioning end. It is 24/7 work and no down time. When you are dealing with autism, you can't afford to take one hour break....it's not the normal family life. It's not the normal play with my kids kind of day....it is work and nothing but work!

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