Sunday, June 26, 2016

When The Tears Roll



When the tears roll down your face, I want to make it better. I want to hold you in my arms until you are done crying.  I want you to be able to let me hold you but you can’t. I know it is not your fault.

When the tears roll down your face, I want to wipe them away. For every tear that falls down your precious face, they fall down mine too. We are in this together.

When the tears roll down your face, I want to take away your struggles. I want to tell you that it will be better one day. I want to tell you that you won’t always have these struggles. I want…..I want…..I just want so much for you. I want to tell you that you will have friends one day that will come over and play. I want that just as bad as I know you want it.

When the tears roll down your face, I want to tell you that you will fall asleep tonight without a fight. I would do anything to make it better for you. I would move mountains for you if I could.

When the tears roll down your face, I want to give you what you want but it’s not that easy. What you want sometimes is not what is the best for you.

When the tears roll down your face, I want to hear you say, “Its okay Mommy, I understand.” I won’t ever give up hope on that!

When the tears roll down your face, I hurt more than you can ever understand. The pain that pours over me is unbearable at times when I see your tears.

When the tears roll down your face, I am here for you no matter what! I am educating myself more and more every day to help you.

When the tears roll down your face, I want you to know that sometimes it is for the best. Mommy wants to take them way but sometimes autism moms have to do “tough love.”

When the tears roll down your face, my heart is breaking in two. I break for you, your brother, and every other person with autism.

When the tears roll down your face, I want you to be able to swim, pedal a bike, catch a ball, hop, and all that fun stuff that other kids your age are doing.

When the tears roll down your face, I want you to be able to understand. I want your body to let you understand.

When the tears roll down your face, I want to take it all away. I want it go away and to never return. However, it is not that easy. Therefore, we will keep on traveling our road together and when the tears start to roll down your face, they do mine too. There is nothing stronger in this world than the bond that we have. Your tears are my tears.


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