Thursday, November 10, 2016


If you woke up today breathing and able to go about your normal day, then please consider yourself lucky. If you lived through the day and are able to crawl in your bed and pull the covers over your healthy body then please consider yourself lucky. I know I consider myself lucky even with all the trials I go through.

It is so sad all the people in this world who have a voice and are able to talk but use it to do nothing but spread negatively.  I'm not going to lie....I logged on Facebook today and immediately got off. Good grief, it was terrible.

I can't help but think, "What would some of these people do if they had my life? What would these people do if they were like Trenton and many other children who can't speak...what would they do if they had such fear every day and couldn't even leave their house....what would they do if they had severe sensory problems and couldn't even brush their teeth like a normal person should...what would some of these people do if they couldn't even sit down and relax on their couch when they don't feel good because they have a child who doesn't stop moving and getting in harms way so he has to literally have an adult with him by his side 24/7....what would some of these people do if  they never were able to leave their house past 5 o'clock....what would some of these people do if they were never able to sit at a restaurant and enjoy a meal relaxing with their 6 year old? I could say so many but it would never end! Seriously, would people still have such negativity about things if they went through major, life changing trials?

Today, I took Trenton to the dentist. It was not the worst experience we have had but it wasn't the best experience either. Trenton did well waiting in the waiting room and pacing back and forth making his noises. When we walked back to the room, it was a different story. I won't go into every detail but I had to hold him down like always. I found out today that it is much harder to hold him down now than when it was even a year ago. He is getting bigger and stronger which makes it much harder.

As I was laying on his body while he was squirming and screaming, he did something different. It was something he has never done before. He kept his eyes glued on my eyes. I talked to him the whole time making sure he knew he was doing good and that Mommy loved him and was there for him. Trenton has never kept his eyes on me during all of the numerous times that I have had to hold him down. Before, his eyes were always everywhere but I felt reassured today that he kept his eyes on mine. I felt like he was taking in every word that I was saying to him.

Our day to day challenges are exhausting on both Trenton and Mommy. It was torture to put Trenton through that today but it had to be done. If you have never had to hold your child down just to put a toothbrush to his front teeth or just so a dentist can simply look in their mouth, then consider yourself lucky.

I consider myself very lucky. It wasn't fun today by any means and those visits never will be. Our days are difficult and will always be difficult. However, I am open about them so I can help educate the world. One thing that I have found is that the people who lack knowledge on things are the people who tend to be negative or pass judgement on situations. I am sure there were people in the dental office who just simply thought that Trenton was being a difficult child. However, that is far from the truth and if people like me don't share our stories and educate others than individuals with autism will always be judged.

Another thing that I have learned along the way is that it takes going through something to understand. I don't wish what we go though with autism on anyone. I don't wish the pain of a divorce or the pain of abandonment that is felt when a spouse leaves on anyone. However, just maybe if everyone is educated on everyone's trials in this world, there wouldn't be such nonsense and such negatively in the world!

We are all different. We all need to accept, educate, and move on while helping each other out.

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