Sunday, July 3, 2016

Wish I Knew.....

Trenton has had some very erratic behavior this week along with several sad moments where he cries a very quiet, sad cry. His sleeping has not been good. He has woke up twice from sleeping in the night crying profusely. A few times this week he has acted like he was seeing things at night. He has vomited a lot this week. He has acted like he had the ant/fire feeling this week and I haven't seen that in a long time.  He is out of control.  If he is not in ABA, he is at home. When he is at home all he does is jump from couch to couch. He walks. He runs around the house. He climbs into the sinks in the kitchen. He climbs on top of the kitchen counters, computer desk, and anything that he can find to climb up. He runs up and down the stairs. He is not happy. Not happy with anything. The only time he is happy is when he is stimming. All he wants to do is stimm and for Trenton that is watching the first 30 seconds of his favorite video over and over.

I am often asked by people, "What does Trenton like to play with?" When I tell people the truth, they are completely floored!
The truth is....he doesn't play with toys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My next question is always, "If he doesn't play with toys, what does he do then?"

Well....he paces around the house...opens the fridge and if I am not right by him he will take the lid off of the milk, juice, or anything else that he gets a handle on and dumps it out all over the kitchen. He takes all of his animal and play figures and  scatters them all over his room. He walks around and kicks them. He will go in every room of the house and see what he can get his hands on to scatter and kick around. He goes into the bathroom if it is not deadbolted and runs the water in the sink and splashes water everywhere. He cries. He fusses. He hits. He throws items and everything that I mentioned in the above paragraph, too.  That is what Trenton does. He doesn't play with toys...he isn't even close to being age appropriate with anything like that. If he is outside, he plays in water and jumps on the trampoline.

With that said, when he is in a bad makes everything WORSE!!!!

I know mothers love it when their children play with toys and keep themselves occupied so that they can make dinner, clean, laundry, make a phone call, etc. I don't get that! Never have and probably never will. I have to follow Trenton around 24/7. He is a child that doesn't know danger...he would hurt himself badly if he is not supervised every minute of his life.

Why did he have a bad week and will it just be a week? Did he get over stimulated at some point and just not able to calm down from it? Is he going to start a bad phase after we have worked so hard to get in a good phase? Is he hurting? What in the world is making him have such erratic, out of control behavior at home and at night? Will he get back in his bedtime routine that I worked so hard to accomplish??

Oh how I wish I knew the answers. The only thing I know is that this life is hard and doing it as a single parent is rough but I will not give up on my boys! I have gave up my whole life for them and will continue to do so.

I do think one thing that is playing a role this week is his teeth. He has some loose teeth and he actually lost a tooth this week. I think this has played into the rough week.  That was a big change for him and the slightest bit of change can get everything "off". When he lost his tooth he handled it well at the time but I think it was due to the fact that he was right in the middle of some of the best sensory stimulation he had in a while. Therefore, his mind was focused on that.

Trenton's autism comes and goes with strengths and weaknesses. He will be in a great phase for a long time and then it disappears and the rough phase is in full swing for awhile. Sometimes his strengths and weaknesses are splintered. He goes a lot into modulation with his challenges and sensory problems. He is a mystery just like his disability.

1 comment:

  1. You are courageous and definitely speak the truth, I applaud you for doing it as a single parent because its really rough and tough. I'm not a single parent but most of the time I feel like it because my husband works majority. The similarities of your boys are like my son and people will ask me questions like that too.
    I will answer them explaining how he is and what he is doing. Keep blogging and telling your stories, I'll keep reading them. 😆